We Were Born to Be Touched: The Sacred Science of Human Connection

Let’s be honest — life is a lot sometimes. The emails, the deadlines, the alarms, the expectations, the hustle and bustle. Our minds are moving faster than our bodies can keep up with, and somewhere in the midst of all this doing… we’ve forgotten something profoundly human.

We need to be touched. Not just emotionally — but physically, intentionally, and with presence.

I’m not just talking about massages (although yes, please). I’m talking about touch as medicine. Touch as nourishment. Touch as a language older than words — one that our bodies still remember even when our minds forget.

The Science Bit (Stay With Me)

From the moment we’re born — actually, even before we’re born — our nervous systems are wired to respond to touch. Studies show that gentle, intentional physical contact helps regulate heart rate, lowers cortisol (our stress hormone), and increases oxytocin — the love-and-trust hormone that makes us feel safe, seen, and settled in our skin.

In other words: touch literally tells our body," Hey, you're safe now. You can exhale."

When babies aren’t held enough, they don’t thrive — even if they’re fed, changed, and kept warm. The same goes for us adults, though we tend to mask our lack of touch with coffee, busyness, or doom-scrolling. Our skin is our largest organ, and it’s covered in nerve endings designed specifically to respond to comforting contact.

Our bodies are not machines. They’re ecosystems. And touch is one of the most essential nutrients for our emotional, physical, and energetic balance.

The Spiritual Bit (Let’s Go Deeper)

Touch is sacred. It speaks to the parts of us that don’t use language — the parts that hold our grief, our longing, our childhood stories, and our silent prayers.

In every craniosacral session, every gentle hold, I witness something miraculous: the body softens, the breath deepens, the soul peeks through. Sometimes there's laughter. Sometimes there are tears. Often, there's a quiet moment when the client says:"I didn’t know how much I needed that."

We live in a world that’s become touch-starved and overstimulated. But somewhere inside, we all crave that moment of being held — without needing to be fixed, explained, or understood. Just held. In our wholeness. In our humanness. In our messy, beautiful, miraculous being.

My Personal Journey

When I began my own healing journey — recovering from chronic migraines, emotional trauma, and years of carrying things that weren’t mine — I realised how little safe, nourishing touch I’d experienced. I didn’t even know what it felt like to fully relax in my own body. I thought I had to be doing something to be worthy of attention, of care, of affection.

But touch taught me otherwise. Through receiving, and later through offering it to others, I learned that touch has nothing to prove. It doesn’t ask questions. It doesn’t need a story. It simply says: You’re here. You’re enough. I see you.

A Little Humour (Because Healing Doesn't Have to Be So Serious)

Now, I know some of us flinch at the idea of being touched — especially if we’ve had past experiences that made touch feel unsafe. I get it. I’ve had clients lie on the table as stiff as a plank, looking like they might launch into space if I so much as brush their shoulder.

But give it a little time, a little warmth, and maybe a sneaky warm towel — and slowly, the walls start to melt. The body starts to remember that it’s allowed to feel good. To receive. To let go.

Also, let’s just admit it: we’re all just big skin-covered nervous systems walking around trying to hold it together. So it’s okay to need a bit of help regulating. No shame in the cuddle game.

Final Thoughts

We were never meant to do this life thing alone — or untouched. Touch is one of the oldest forms of medicine. It costs nothing. It asks for presence. And it returns us to something primal, spiritual, and deeply human.

So whether it’s a hug from a friend, your feet in the sand, a pet snuggled beside you, or a session on the table where you can finally, finally exhale — give yourself the gift of contact.

Because you are nature. And nature thrives in connection.

✨ A Story from the Table

One of my clients — let’s call her Racheal — came to see me after years of holding it all together.

A mother, a carer, a full-time worker, and like so many women, someone who gave everything to everyone else. She wasn’t even sure why she booked in. “I just knew I needed… something,” she said.

She lay down on the table, fully clothed, and I gently placed my hands beneath her head — still, quiet, listening. About 10 minutes in, I felt a shift. Her body began to soften. Her breath deepened. A tear rolled down her cheek.

“I didn’t realise how much I needed to be touched,” she whispered.

That session didn’t fix all her problems. But something powerful happened — something subtle and sacred. Her body was met. Not judged, not pushed, not analysed. Just met. With presence. With compassion. With touch.

She came back a few times after that, and each time, she left a little lighter. A little more in her body. A little more herself.

If this story resonates with you — if something inside is whispering “I need that” — you're not alone.

My table is a space where your body is welcome, your story is sacred, and your healing is honoured.

Interesting reads and studies done on touch being a key element to the body regulating:

https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/36346350/

https://self-compassion.org/wp-content/uploads/2021/12/Dreisoerner-et-al.-2021-Self-soothing-touch-and-being-hugged-reduce-cortis.pdf?

https://time.com/504/how-cuddling-saves-tiny-babies/?